


Emotional Support Super-Soldier

by Millennialpink22



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Anxiety Attacks, Arc Reactor, Character Death, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Implied/Referenced Torture, Iron Man 1, Kidnapping, M/M, Not Beta Read, Peter Parker is Tony Stark's Biological Child, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Pre-Relationship, Psychological Trauma, References to Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, Therapy, Tony Stark Has Nightmares, Tony Stark Has Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, Tony Stark Has Self-Esteem Issues, and it shows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-03-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:42:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23294194
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Millennialpink22/pseuds/Millennialpink22
Summary: After years of suffering in silence, Tony's facade is starting to break. He believes that he can continue being a strong father without accepting that he needs help. After his ESA takes a liking to Tony, Steve Rogers realizes that Tony cannot continue living like this.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, Sunset Bain/Tony Stark
Comments: 11
Kudos: 125





	Emotional Support Super-Soldier

**Author's Note:**

> I busted this out in a short amount of time and it's honestly not my best nor that decent. I thought I would add more but I decided to leave the ending more ambiguous. I'm wildly out of practice and have been trying to flex my writing skills (or lack thereof) in other areas and it's still not proving effective but hey, a girl is trying! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy this somewhat!

Everyone has a breaking point and Tony worried what would happen the day he reached his. Life had not been kind to him in the last decade and that itself was a severe understatement; but he could not admit that to himself. If he did, it meant acknowledging the horrors that he had been subject to. It felt like the universe was constantly testing him and he had not studied for any of the bullshit that had been thrown his way and he was left struggling to maintain a facade of sanity. However, Tony was starting to feel this facade crumble more and more with each passing day. It was harder to quirk his lips into a strained smile. It was harder to will himself to carry out basic tasks like showering and eating. It was harder to be there for his five-year-old son, Peter. Truly, it was getting harder to even live at this point.

The misfortunes began with a kidnapping on his twentieth birthday. He had been giving his very first weapons demonstration alongside his old man and as he was making jokes with one of the guys in the humvee, Jimmy, everything had burst into flames and he was overwhelmed by screams and a whining in his ear that indicated that a bullet had narrowly missed blowing his brains out. He found himself frozen and was suddenly yanked out by his father. 

He couldn’t hear a single thing and only felt his dad’s hands holding his face and yelling something as explosions hazily filtered through his hearing. Finally, after his dad shoved a gun into his hands, Tony had come back to reality and expertly aimed the thing, as he’d obviously learned considering he was now developing these things only to find that his dad had mistakenly given him one that was jammed. 

_ “Dad!”  _ He had screamed, only to accidentally draw his father’s attention away, leading to Howard Stark being shot right through the head.  _ “No!”  _ Tony screamed, sprinting toward him only to stumble over rocks and find himself eye to eye with a bomb that was literally marked with his own name:  _ STARK INDUSTRIES.  _ He had attempted to scramble away and was sent flying back with the force of the blast that embedded shrapnel through his bullet-proof vest and right to the heart many did not know he even had during this time period of his life. 

Admittedly, Tony had been incredibly selfish and arrogant at the time of this event. But even so, Tony did not think anyone deserved to be put through what he had which had been three months of captivity which consisted of isolation, beatings, and relentless torture methods that plagued his dreams to this day. 

He didn’t blast his way out. He didn’t show the Ten Rings what he was made of. He didn’t rise from the ashes of captivity. He accepted his fate alongside an older man, Yinsen, who was forced to nurse him through a raging infection caused by the injury that refused to heal in the abysmal conditions he had been subject to for twelve weeks. He ended up having an electro-magnet implanted in his chest without any anaesthetic. To this day, he could still feel the indescribable pain and hear the sound of the bone saw. 

He ended up submitting to his handlers and had started building the Jericho with hands, unsteady as a result from the fever that never broke while he was there. Luckily, as he was making the final touches after he was forced to watch Yinsen receive a bullet to the brain and a brutal beating when he  _ attempted  _ to defy them, he was rescued by a unit that was led by his best friend, Rhodey’s father. He had never stopped looking for Tony under his son’s wishes and Tony was finally out of there. 

If only his mind had acknowledged this fact and did not continue to warp his dreams every fucking night.

After the kidnapping, Tony was forced to stay in a hospital in Germany where they attempted to remove the arc reactor that was forcefully embedded in his chest and only modified when he had a brief moment of clarity in his feverish mind. The attempt was to no avail. No one from the outside world contacted him during the week he was in the hospital and he was left feeling scared, alone, and confused. When he returned home, he was met with the fact that not only had he missed his father’s funeral but his mother had committed suicide as she knew her husband to be dead and could only assume her son was as well. She could not handle the pain.

Tony came home to find he had no family left. He was in physical pain from his still healing injuries and had no one to stand by his side. All he had was Rhodey whom he hadn’t wanted to see while he was in such a state. If that wasn’t the tip of the iceberg, he was also informed that he was to inherit his father’s company. He was just twenty-- he couldn’t even legally drink (not that that had stopped him before) and he was meant to take on a multi-billion dollar company without his father’s guiding hand or his mother’s supportive nature. 

He ended up not taking the company. He had looked at the papers long enough to realize he was in no position to do so. Initially, he’d appointed his father’s partner, Obadiah Stane to take on the company for which he appeared the most qualified. Everything seemed okay at that point, and Tony attempted to let himself heal by isolating himself from the public eye that made it known that they all felt as if Tony deserved what he had been through solely because of a few underage drinking citations and a reportedly promiscuous nature. 

Pepper Potts, his late father’s PA, who had now become his PA, did some digging and discovered that it had been Obie who had ordered the hit on him and his father. He was the one that had caused all of this (even though a niggling voice in the back of his head told him it was  _ his  _ fault that his father was dad because he had screamed for him like a pathetic and weak child). There was no huge fight where Tony overtook Stane. He simply submitted the information to a few government agencies and the man he once saw as a father figure was sentenced to life in a high security prison. 

Tony, as was his skill, never processed that. He never took the time to accept the fact that he was supposed to be dead and his genius, which he did not even utilize whilst in captivity for he was deathly ill, was what kept him alive. To this day, he questions whether they should have let him live.

Tony did not take over the company. He decided Pepper was the best fit which was appalling to some of the general public but he had faith that she would take it in a better direction. After that was all finalized, Tony was fed up with life in the limelight where he could easily be hurt by jealous enemies that wanted to see him dethroned. So, Tony decided to move out of his lavious mansion and began working as a mechanic. Sure, he still had his riches but he elected to keep that in his savings and figured a modest life would warrant the least amount of hurt.

He’d been wrong. He found himself in a relationship with a woman named Sunset Bain. She had been everything to Tony. Not only was she gorgeous, but she was smart, funny, and loved everything about him. Or at least she seemed to at first. She fed off the vulnerability he must have given off in waves. She talked him into giving her a majority of his own money-- not enough to deem him anything less than filthy rich but enough where Pepper and Rhodey both voiced their concerns; but he hadn’t listened.

He allowed himself to be manipulated and smacked around by her. He couldn’t do much. Afghanistan had left him thin and wiry. He never regained the weight he’d lost for he suffered from chronic pain with the reactor in his chest that started poisoning him halfway through their relationship. As if he needed  _ that.  _ He found himself violently ill for months. His memory grew feeble and he couldn’t stand for long periods of time. She took advantage of that. She began stealing the designs he kept in his basement for he was too weak to put up a fight. He never did get them back. 

He ended up curing himself with the formula for a new element his father had left for him and he thought she would be ecstatic at such news. He didn’t even accost her for the obvious dent in the stacks of designs she had clearly taken. Instead, she grew angry that he was getting his strength back and he simply continued to accept the verbal and emotional abuse he was subject to. He couldn’t speak up. Who would believe that he, Tony Stark, supposed playboy and former businessman could be abused. No one would. If they did, they’d say he deserved it.

_ Maybe he did _ , he convinced himself during that time. He was starting to think the same thing now.

Tony ended up getting Sunset pregnant toward the end of their relationship. He had not known that to be possible for he thought he was only shooting blanks after having nearly died from heavy metal poisoning. Plus, Sunset insisted he did not need protection as she was on birth control. When they discovered the pregnancy, Sunset immediately left him and informed him that she would be expecting a substantial amount of child support. 

Tony had been devastated despite being told incessantly from Rhodey that this was a good thing. It definitely was. He was miserable and broken down each day while with her. But Tony could not help but be sad that he would be nothing to his child except a form of financial support. Initially, Rhodey told him not to sweat it because there was  _ no  _ way it was his for Sunset had been cheating on him with Tony’s former friend, Tiberius Stone. A paternity test proved that the child was indeed Tony’s and he would never get to meet them.

Until, the one bright light fought its way through the clouds that had become Tony’s life in the form of Peter. While Tony had been providing for the child without having ever met him, Sunset decided the money wasn’t worth it for Peter was a supposed disaster three-year-old and she wanted nothing to do with him. She ended up dumping him on Tony’s doorstep and left without a word. 

Tony immediately loved Peter and felt a semblance of peace having  _ his  _ child by his side. Tony could not contain his sobs when he first saw him. He had missed his birth, his first words, his first steps, his first  _ everything.  _ He wouldn’t miss anymore. Peter was his. He fawned over his bright blue eyes that were painfully like Sunset’s and everything else that was completely a mirror-image of him. He was perfect and the only light in his life. Sure, he was a little chatty and had an endless supply of energy-- but to Tony, he was perfect. 

The tragedies seemed to stop with Peter; however the pain remained. Tony never took the time to really cope with everything he had been through. He never had time to discuss the torture he was subject to or the pain of losing both parents for he was immediately faced with the trouble surrounding Obidiah and then palladium poisoning. He never had a chance to address the abuse he endured from Sunset as he knew no one would take him seriously and he was then met with the heavy responsibility of raising a child. So he never made an attempt to help himself. 

Sure, he would crumble there and then. He would wake from nightmares, stuffing his pillow into his mouth as to muffle screams as he felt hands deep in his chest which to this day,  _ still hurt.  _ He cried in the shower at times when the heavy weight in his chest became too much and would get out and return to his son with an overstretched grin that never met his eyes. He found himself unable to get into another relationship as his mind was constantly reminding him that he shouldn’t trust them. But maybe he was okay being alone and attempting to persevere for Peter’s sake. 

It was getting harder though. So fucking hard. He felt a persistent weight on his chest that seemed to sink him into his mattress. He would stare mindlessly and allow tears to roll off his cheeks while he found designs in the ceiling pattern. He would only get out of bed when Peter needed him to take him to school. He quit his job. He had plenty of money to get by. Going to work meant doing things. He couldn’t do that anymore. He would set an alarm to pick up Peter from school and lay in the bed which steadily took on a foul stench from where he had stopped showering. His stomach would growl loudly but he couldn’t bring himself to eat. On the days he could bring himself to shower he noticed the way his bones were starting to poke through his skin in a manner that reminded him a lot of how he looked upon his return from Afghanistan. 

He wished that he cared. He didn’t. He didn’t think he deserved to live more often than not. He wanted to believe he didn’t deserve what had been thrust upon him years earlier. But maybe he did. Maybe he shouldn’t have been such a self-absorbed asshole in college. Maybe he should have allowed himself to be shot and let his father live. Maybe he should have asked Obie to try harder. Maybe he should just call it quits. Peter deserved more than a dad that was as broken as Tony was. He remembers a time where he could play with him but recently, the task seemed daunting. He would feed Peter and bathe him and take him to school. He tried playing with him but the crushing feeling in his gut would gnaw at him from the inside out and he would find himself cutting their time shorter and shorter as he found himself in the throes of panic attacks that left him dry-heaving or depressive episodes that left his brain feeling like TV static. 

But he was okay. He was managing. He couldn’t quit. He didn’t want to. Missing three years of Peter’s life was too much. He’d only been in it for two and he wanted to see every minute even if he was in mental agony the whole time. It was worth it for Peter’s sake. He could get by without fixing himself. He didn’t need help even if Rhodey had on countless occasions told him he needed to talk to someone with increasing urgency each time he happened to visit the Stark household. It was fine.

xXx

“Hey, daddy?” Peter says, as they make their drive home from school one day. 

“Yes, Petie?” Tony says, with a forced smile that actually hurts his cheeks. 

“We’re doin’ a fundraising thing for the animal shelter at school and we have to raise money by goin’ from door to door and askin’ for money!”

“I could give you s--”

“I wanna do the door thing, though dad! The top fundraiser gets to go to the shelter during school one day!” Peter begs. “Can we please! I don’t have no homework today!” 

Tony laughs. “Of course kiddo. Lets just swing by the house and we can start.”

Tony decided to take a quick shower to diminish whatever depression scent has seeped into his skin from laying listlessly in his bed while Peter was at school. He attempts to make himself look fairly presentable with a long, overdue shave and a pair of jeans that are getting too loose around his hips and an old MIT sweatshirt that is starting to fray at the sleeves. It’s not terribly cold for October, but Tony elects to put on a light jacket and grabs a beanie for Peter. They get Peter’s envelope together along with the script provided and make their way through various neighborhoods.

It’s clear that Peter has gotten a head start on the other kids for no parent, even ones that Tony thinks he recognizes, even seem aware that this fundraising is going on. Peter gets an impressive amount of check and cash donations that they stuff into the envelope that Tony holds close to his torso for he knows how slippery Peter’s hands can be if the time Peter accidentally dropped Tony’s phone down a storm drain is anything to go by. 

Peter happily skips up to a rather quaint looking home. The landscape, although decaying with the fall weather, is still well kept and rather beautiful to look at. The leaves on the tree in front of the house appear to have a more vibrant combination or oranges, reds, and yellows than all the other houses which shouldn’t make sense since trees like this are mass planted but it's almost like the owner has concocted a special tree cocktail to ensure that his is the prettiest.

Tony soon discovers the owner of the house is even prettier than the tree. Peter gives the door a gentle knock and jumps excitedly at the sound of a bark. Tony snorts softly and as the door opens he is first met with the sight of an angel. The man, a solid 6’2”, has a sculpted jaw that could easily slice through glass. His shoulders are offensively broad and nearly take up the entire doorway while his waist is slim and cut under a t-shirt that is at least two sizes too small which leaves nothing to the imagination. Tony can see the defined lines of abs beneath the shirt and he thinks he might choke right there. Before Tony can die of embarrassment, he is suddenly met with a beautiful labradoodle that immediately begins weaving in through Tony’s slender legs. 

“Hi!” Peter greets, tearing Tony from his lovesick trance. “I’m Peter and I’m a student at Shield Elementary! Today, I’m trying to raise money for Xavier's Home for Animals!” He gives the man his most delicate smile. “Would you be interested in donating today!”

“Why, of course!” The man laughs and Tony thinks he may have died and gone to heaven. “Let me just get some cash, Peter! Peggy, come!”

The dog does not budge and simply leans against Tony’s legs, looking up at him with gentle eyes. Tony chuckles and scratches the top of Peggy’s head. “She’s a sweet girl.”

“Do you mind if she stays outside? She must have to go out.”

“Yeah, it’s no problem…”

“Steve.”

“Tony.”

“Good to meet you.” The man smiles and shuts the door to grab his check.

“What a good doggy!” Peter squeals, scratching behind Peggy’s floppy ears.

“That she is!” Tony laughs, feeling the dog’s weight get progressively heavier as the dog refuses to even look at Peter which thankfully the boy does not notice. She is simply focused on Tony and makes a whining sound which Tony attempts to mend by stroking her. The dog is persistent, however. She continues to lean against his legs and he decides he can no longer bear the weight and decides to sit down on the porch where the dog immediately plops down on his legs. 

“You’re a persistent one, huh?” Tony says, laughing. 

“So here you go, Pet--” Steve starts, before taking note of the position Tony and Peggy are in. 

“I’m sorry.” Tony laughs, attempting to budge under the dog. “She was putting all her weight on me and decided to make me her new bed.” 

“Oh.” Steve says and his face turns into one that is concerned and he looks at Tony. “Are you okay?”

“What? Yeah. She’s not that heavy and she’s really sweet.” Tony answers, laughing slightly. 

“No… uh, Peggy is my emotional support animal. I have really bad PTSD and what she’s doing to you is called deep pressure therapy. She can sense that you’re anxious right now and is trying to calm you by putting her weight on you in order to ground you.” 

“Oh.” Tony says dumbly. 

“And the fact that she isn’t even looking at me tells me that you’re really not okay, Tony.” 

“Daddy gets sad a lot and Uncle Rhodey wants him to see a brain doctor but he won’t do it.” Peter decides to inform this man that is essentially a stranger to the both of them. 

“ _ Peter Benjamin Stark.”  _ Tony grumbles lowly. “We don’t interrup--”

“Wait,  _ you’re  _ Tony Stark?” The man asks, slumping against the doorway and Tony immediately feels his face heat up. “You dropped off the face of the Earth after you were-- oh wow… this explains a  _ lot.”  _

“It’s fine… really. I’m really sorry and I promise I’m not just trying to have my son get money out of you. He really just wanted to go door to d--”

“No. Don’t sweat  _ that.  _ I just… Can you come in? I don’t feel right letting you go home right now.”

“Excuse me?”

“Peggy never acts like this… even with me. She usually takes me talking again as cue that a panic attack or dissociative episode is over. You’re talking to me and she still senses that you’re not in the right state of mind. She’s worried and I don’t think you should be alone.”

“Look, Steve, I really appreciate it, but I think--”

“Please.” He suddenly begs. “I let my best friend slip under my radar and now he’s… he’s gone now.” 

“I-I’m not…”

“Please come in. Both of you.” He urges, helping Tony up from under the dog’s weight. “Just talk to me. You don’t have to say anything really but I would feel better if you cleared your mind slightly.” He guides Tony to his living room and points to a soft couch for him to sit on while he takes the loveseat.

Peter follows from close behind. “My son, he…”

“What do you like doing for fun, bud?” Steve asks and Tony’s heart melts at the man’s ability to connect with his son so easily. 

“I like drawing.” He shrugs. 

“Well, lucky for you! I have a _ whole  _ art studio in that room to the left. Feel free to do whatever you want in there, alright?” 

“Okay!” Peter squeals, running off.

“I really shou--”

“He’s fine. I promise. You, however…” Steve laughs a little as Peggy settles herself across Tony’s lap again. “Are you okay?”

“What? Yes. I told you.”

“Peggy doesn’t--”

“She might need re-trained.” Tony inadvertently snaps. He swallows thickly. “Sorry.”

“No. It’s okay. Irritability is common with anxiety. I shouldn’t try to bombard you with so many questions.”

Tony is silent. 

“Tony, I...I know we just met but I really think I am in a position to say you should see a doctor… a therapist… something.”

“I don’t need one.” Tony mutters.

“Tony. You have been through a lot. Anyone who's been through half of what you have needs help.”

“I-I can’t. I have Peter and I’m just busy.”

“You’re not working. You know, even though you’re letting yourself lay low, it’s still public knowledge that you quit your job. That itself is a sign--”

“Stop trying to diagnose me!” Tony snaps and Peggy rests her head against his chest where his heart beats frantically behind the reactor.

“I’m not. Tony, clearly you’re a good dad to him. But, can you really be the best dad if you’re not letting yourself heal?” 

“H-how dare you--” Tony stumbles over his words, feeling tears start to burn his eyes. “I-I do everything fo-for him!”

“I know. I can tell. But you’re doing nothing for you and something is gonna give, Tony.” Steve gets up and kneels in front of him. “Please, Tony. That something can’t be you. You need to help yourself this time. You’re hurting.”

“No ‘m not.” He says as tears betray him.

“You’re a good man, Tony. I can tell you care about him and you think help will distract you from him. It won’t. It’ll make everything easier. I promise.” 

“H-How do you--”

“I do. I’ve been there.”

“It just fucking hurts.” Tony suddenly gasps out, sobs threatening to quake his body. Steve moves his thumb under his eyes, swiping away tears and Tony finds himself leaning into the touch.

“Come with me to my support group tomorrow. It’s a group therapy that is run by my friend, Sam Wilson.” He tells him. “I’ll pick you up… but right now, let me get you and Peter something to eat.”

“Steve, I…”

“Please?”

“Okay.” Tony mumbles and Steve wraps his arms around him, arching himself up to avoid knocking into Peggy. “T-thank you.” 

“And after that, if you’d want… maybe we um get lunch or something?”

“I-I’d like that.” Tony confesses, wiping at his eyes.

“You’ll be okay, Tony. I know you will be. It won’t be tomorrow. It might not even be this year. But you’ll get there. You deserve to feel okay again. There’s no need to go through all of this by yourself.”

For the first time, Tony believes such sentiments and thinks that maybe he can be okay again. For Peter. For Steve. For himself. 

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> This is actually based on my own personal experience in regards to the whole dog thing. I was fundraising for a local hospital and a woman's emotional support dog would not leave my side the whole time and I didn't realize she was an ESA and the owner was immediately concerned for me and was like uh yeah she's a therapy dog... and I was just like oh. She did not invite me in or anything like that but told me to get help if I needed it. Honestly... only would happen to me and to this day, I think it's hYSTERICAL. 
> 
> I had been in therapy for 3 years at that point. I am just a self hating asshole if you can't tell by my persistent self-deprecation and self-doubt. Aye. 
> 
> Stay healthy during this time! :)


End file.
